LIVING WITH ONE'S LIMITATIONS

I just got my lab test results. The 2-D Echo and Holter Monitor results validate that there is something definitely wrong with my heart. I have atrial fibrillation according to the Holter monitor findings and the echocardiogram said I have ventricular hypertrophy. I had to look these up in the internet to understand what was going on inside my body.

In a nutshell,my heart is beating irregularly and the danger with this,at least in my case, is that some blood may not be pumped out of the atrium. This blood may coagulate and form clots which if dislodged may be transported to the brain and cause what is known as an embolic stroke. One treatment for this is to give medication (warfarin aka Coumadin) that will help thin the blood so that clotting does not form.

Now as to why I had this condition in the first place I don't really know. I have engaged in regular exercise, I have controlled my intake of "bad-for-the-heart" food and I can say I am not under any form of stress, and yet this happened.

So I guess this is one of life's surprises for me!

It's just another one of those events that makes me realize my limitations and maybe challenges me to still live fully in spite of these.After all, I did not wish for this.

One positive thing has already come out of this...I got to review my basic anatomy and are more familiar with terms related to the heart's functions! I sort of understand what I'm up against...and as the GI Joe slogan goes..."Knowing is half the battle!"

I also know for sure that the Good Lord wants me to slow down and enjoy life! Thanks to my seminary training I realize I've been programmed to rush through life so as not to waste time.

Maybe this is the Lord's way of giving me a much needed break!

ON MENTAL TOUGHNESS AND ON SLOWING DOWN

I watched Tiger Woods win the WGC Invitational yesterday. He almost gave it away when he couldn't keep his lead in regulation play. But during the playoff with Stewart Cink,who battled him hole for hole,he showed why he was a champion. In the fourth playoff hole,he stuck his approach shot within 8 feet while Cink's went into the bunker. Given that opportunity Tiger sunk the birdie putt for the win. Cink had his chance in the previous hole but didn't capitalize on it...therein lay the difference. Both were under a lot of pressure but I guess Tiger handled it better...was mentally tougher than Stewart...that's why he came out on top...for the fourth straight time!

Now that I have this nagging problem of an irregular heartbeat I realized once again that perhaps the Good Lord wants me to slow down some more.Maybe enjoy life a little bit more in the process. After all, I did my best in trying to stay healthy & yet my genetics seems to have acted up in the process.

This is just another obstacle I have to work around.

THE GRASS IS GREENER IN OUR BACKYARD

These past two weeks,I had the chance to visit two of the Philippines'famous resorts:Dos Palmas and Pearl Farm.

We went to Dos Palmas when it was raining so we didn't get to see many of its attractions like the schools of fishes and colorful corral reefs that one would normally see if the water is clear. We had a delicious lunch at the Isla Puting Buhangin, about 15 minutes by ferry boat from Dos Palmas and in spite of the rain we still marvelled at the beauty of the place.

We had better luck when we went to Pearl Farm. The weather was perfect so that when we docked at the wharf you could see fish swimming in the clear waters along the shore. We visited the island of the Floreindo's and checked out the villas which were being rented out to tourists. If I had the money and the time to waste this would be an idyllic place to do it. It was so peaceful..and restful.

No wonder many foreign tourists who have heard about these places...and do have the money,come over to our country!

It is unfortunate that many who live in our country can't even afford to see such sights which are right in our own backyard!

Nota Republic - Muna

This MTV features my eldest son Theodeore Joseph "TJ" acting as his cute self. He hears the music of Nota Republic playing in his head and appears to see them,but when he looks around he sees no one! Could it be his imagination just running wild?

Our Great Chopper Ride

REFLECTIONS ON TWO TV FEATURES

This weekend I watched two documentaries on TV which got me thinking about the oddities of life,but more specially how one's beliefs affects the way one behaves.

The first,which was shown on Discovery channel's "On the Run," was about an international scam artist and the second,which was on National Geographic, was about Mennonite's search for their "perfect world."

The first feature reenacted the hunt for a Chinese guy from Malaysia named Mr. Wee,who managed to swindle people of over $4 M and ended up getting free after serving short terms in prison. His modus operandi was to sweet talk people into investing their money on businesses which he promised would give them profitable returns.

The segment I caught showed him putting up a magazine in Netherlands called Publique. He convinced most of his employees except a certain Ellen, to put in money in the venture. Then he spent their money on his personal pursuits until the business folded up. It was this Ellen who helped put him in jail eventually.

What was interesting to note was that Mr. Wee was a confirmed psychopath and yet he was able to convince intelligent people into giving him their money! I couldn't help but recall Rose Balajay and her Multitel scam operation which robbed many people (including my sister & law and my wife) of their life's savings! The lure of easy money does blind people and makes them believe what they want to believe.

The piece on the Mennonites was also on how one's beliefs influences one's actions.

It showed families and individuals belonging to three different colonies of Mennonites; two in Mexico and one in Bolivia. One colony in Mexico which was called El Capulin was a "progressive" one which allowed its members to use electricity and rubber tires on its tractors. With electricity the community could produce more products (e.g. milk and cheese) and enjoy amenities like TV, which in most Mennonite circles is forbidden.

I was puzzled at first about the issue on rubber tired tractors until it was explained by one of the men interviewed. He explained that having rubber tires on tractors would allow their boys to "steal" away to town and drink beer. Having only metal wheels would discourage them.

The other two colonies were less progressive but the Mennonites there preferred that kind of life even though they wished they had more money so they didn't live poorly! As the feature progressed I understood that the perfect world they were after was one in which they could practice their religion and basically live in peace, away from the trappings and temptations of civilization.

These people who shunned the more progressive colony of El Capulin to live in the more desolate colonies did so because they believed this was the correct way of living their faith!

ON DEATH AND DYING

It's been two weeks since I started having heart palpitations and because of its effects on me sometimes I can't help but think about death and dying.

Though the palpitations are less pronounced,thanks to the medication I've been taking,I feel some difficulty breathing properly since my heartbeats are irregular. When I do something that requires some effort like walking upstairs or taking a walk to Shangrila I can't do it as quickly as I used to because I feel some heaviness on my chest and some weariness.

I tried doing a light work out the other day and though I could easily lift 30 pound weights prudence dictated that I just stick with very light weights. I didn't even sweat...soit didn't count as a work out!

It's a bother really.

So am I just waiting for the big attack? I try not to think of it because I know I've still a lot of things I want to do. And when I think of my wife and kids and how my passing away will affect them...I get the motivation to keep on living.

Perhaps what God wants me to do right now is just slow down and enjoy life as much as I can.